Alcoholism Recovery & Treatment

question by Jessa : I am a driver for my husband alcoholism. How do I stop? We got married four years. I love him and want to stay with him, but I know he has a total alcoholic and the family, because it is suffereing. I know I can not control it. I tried very hard and now I’m to the point where I accept that can not change it. But I do not want to leave. How do I start from detatch? This is so painful for me. best answer:

response Glory
find local group Al-Anon. This is a program for people who love alcoholics. Not necessarily remain an alcoholic, to resolve and stop. The first step is to recognize and get help for themselves. Good luck.http: / / www.alanon.org.za/

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Question by Cindy: How do I convince my husband that I need inpatient rehab for alcoholism? He insists that it won’t help me.?
Because I tried outpatient rehab once and didn’t stick with it, he is positive that “rehab” of any sort would be a useless waste of money. I keep thinking of all the money I currently spend on wine…. This has been going on for three years, ever since I had gastric bypass and could no longer fulfill my food addiction. I apparently just replaced that addiction with the addiction to alcohol. ANY help would be appreciated!

Best answer:

Answer by Nick
I’m not really sure about the difference between the two, but my dad used to be an alcoholic before he was told he wouldn’t make it past 39 if he kept drinking. He has to take liver pills now.

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we have been married for 43 years. I am 60 yr old. He is a gemini which is two persons in one! he is drug and alcohol dependent. when he doesn’t have the drug you cannot talk to him or even be in the same room. So he then turns to alcohol which makes him dangerous. when he is on the drugs he is very agreeable and relaxed to live with.I have been on this roller coaster ride all these years. I DO NOT WANT to live the rest of my life like this! but I can’t seem to leave, I care about what happens to him, I’ll miss my home, I’m scared I won’t be able to support myself, I can’t live in an apartment without my animals! I don’t think I can mentally handle the separation. I will not ask him to sell the house or give me money. He has taken my sexuality away, no sex, We don’t talk unless hes high. I’ve been to counseling without success, they all want me to leave him! Someone help me, cause I can’t seem to make the decision.Then I think I’ve stood it out this long and now I’m going to leave him in our retirement years and he will die alone. As you can see I am very torn in the decision to do whats right for me! Thank you for listening.

we have been married for 43 years. I am 60 yr old. He is a gemini which is two persons in one! he is drug and alcohol dependent. when he doesn’t have the drug you cannot talk to him or even be in the same room. So he then turns to alcohol which makes him dangerous. when he is on the drugs he is very agreeable and relaxed to live with.I have been on this roller coaster ride all these years. I DO NOT WANT to live the rest of my life like this! but I can’t seem to leave, I care about what happens to him, I’ll miss my home, I’m scared I won’t be able to support myself, I can’t live in an apartment without my animals! I don’t think I can mentally handle the separation. I will not ask him to sell the house or give me money. He has taken my sexuality away, no sex, We don’t talk unless hes high. I’ve been to counseling without success, they all want me to leave him! Someone help me, cause I can’t seem to make the decision.Then I think I’ve stood it out this long and now I’m going to leave him in our retirement years and he will die alone. As you can see I am very torn in the decision to do whats right for me! Thank you for listening.

My husband of nine years completely flipped out on me today. I was in town, and told him I would be about an hour, I was with my older brother and younger sister and niece and nephews. Well after an hour he called and asked why I was still there. I told him I was just hanging out, and he said ” I thought you were just gonna be gone a little while”? Well i told him I would leave in about an hour cause I had to go to the store still. So he hung up on me. After an hour he called back and I told him i was getting the stuff he asked me to get at the store. When I get home I tried talking to him and he starts yelling at me so loud our two kids open the bedroom door to see what happened. I told them to go back out and he is putting on his shoes and everything, tells me he wants me out, he will call the police, grabs my keys and takes my car keys of my set. When I do finally get them back, I happened to find them an hour later, i went outside and he took all my cds and smashed them. So i took his keys, I shouldnt have, and when he asked for them I told him its not cool is it? You tried so hard to be in control of the car and when I couldnt leave you dont like it. My kids were both there I told them to go to their rooms, and he started yelling again before they left. I told him to calm down, he was scaring them, he called me a b*tch, and all kinds of other names and said I hope you die. He will not talk to me now, I dont know what to do and I am so frustrated because I dont know how to fix it. Hes been to rehab before for alcohol but I know hes not drinking and I dont think hes doing drugs. Any help??? I want to go to counseling but he wont go.
I dont think he is even considering cheating, I mean we have been together for so long. I have two kids, yeah I am a stay at home mom, but this is a very small town so if he even though I would think he would even accuse me of it before he got so mad. I know he will never be physical with me in a bad way its not his nature. we have been together 11 years so I am sure of that. But its just trying to figure out how to fix it.
Ok, he has never done this to me before, this is all new to me. After 9 years I will not leave him because he scared me by yelling. I am trying to find a way to fix it.
he went to rehab through a clinic, said we would go to counseling after he got out, he didnt like his counselor there, but he always had a reason why not to go. now he just wont go. as for alone time or anything I doubt that is it because he just made a point of telling me weeks before that he wants to go when he wants to go. I know he has problems with dealing with stress, we both do, i have epilepsy. he takes a couple prescriptions for them but I dont know if he is now taking them or not. He just doesnt tell me
We have never mesed around on each other or been in this situation before.